Every Girl Is A Princess?

Recently, I read an article dealing with gender roles and how all too often girls are pegged into the "play mommy," "be a princess," or "play with barbies" categories. The article went on to further say that these gender roles are dangerous to the developing child and their perception of what it means to be a girl (or a boy.) It also said that only gender neutral ideas should be placed in child's head an that both types of gender toys should be included as a default, no matter what the child may show interest in. In my experience, I find this to be bull. I think gender roles have a certain cred. to them. I also don't think they have to be forced to be applicable. I don't recall my mom or dad EVER telling me I had to like pink, wear dresses (except to church because that's how church was back then,) or play princess. I liked pink when I was little, but later, my favorite color was green. It was green for well into early high school years when it morphed into purple, hot pink, black, and white. To this day, I love purple and hot pink.

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I rarely played princess growing up. I always wanted to be queen. Heh. We actually used to play what my sister, Hannah, refers to as "Amelia." I was around 12 or so. My sister, Kristin, was 11. Hannah was around 3. I was the queen, Kristin was the princess, and Hannah was the servant girl. Now, don't be alarmed about what I'm going to say next. Hannah, always played the part of Amelia, the servant girl...naked. She was the kid who would shed her clothes shortly after we put them on her. We have a video of her naked with her butt in the air digging in the garden and playing with the hose. No lie. She's 16 now and probably LOVES that I'm sharing this with you, but nonetheless, it happened! Anyway, so Hannah always was Amelia, the naked servant girl. She sometimes wore an apron, if I could convince her to do so. We all loved this game! Hannah loved getting us drinks, "sweeping," fanning us, etc. SHE would ask to play this game, and being such good big sisters, Kristin and I were always willing. :-D That's about as close to playing princess as Kristin and I really got.

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Kristin and I played Barbies like it was our job. We also played school quite often. We loved our American Girl dolls (I have Samantha, Kristin has Kirsten and Hannah has Kit.) We liked going on adventures in the woods down by the creek. We rode our horse. We had picnics. We played sports (I was a softball and basketball gal. Kristin was a cheerleader and soccer player. Hannah is a swimmer and soccer player.) Kristin and I went through a power ranger and teenage mutant ninja turtles phase. We loved Batman, Gargoyles is still, to this day, one of my favorite cartoons. We also loved Carebears, Polly Pockets, and Lizzie McGuire. We are all girls. We all liked girly and non-girly things.

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Today, my sister Kristin, is 24 and a crunchy hippy. Ha. Ok. Not exactly...but close. She loves hiking, camping, music festivals, etc. and she's still very feminine. Hannah is 16 and is a HUGE flirt. She loves color guard, tutus, and really crappy music. (She doesn't think it's crappy, though.) She can get down and dirty working in the garden and doesn't bat an eye. I am a 25 year old wife who adores her husband. I love sparkles, babies, and crafting/sewing. I hate being sweaty/dirty, but if it's serving others or improving my life, I am more than willing. We all were raised the same way, in the same house, by the same parents, with the same values, and with pretty much the same toys. We are not defined by our gender, but we all seem to embrace being female, while not being over the top girly girls. (As I discussed this post with the hubs and Hannah, we came to the conclusion that at this stage in life, I am by far the most girly girl out of the three sisters.)

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What do you think of traditional gender roles? Do you feel like the psychological community is putting too much emphasis on not defining gender roles or not enough? Do you feel like society forces us into gender roles? Remember, no opinion is better than another, just don't expect me to agree with you, if our opinions differ! ;-)

Happy 32nd Birthday To My Hubs!

Today is a very special day for the most special person in the world to me. Today is my hubs 32nd birthday!

Alex Vance Bailey, Jr. was born to Alex Vance Bailey, Sr. and Katherine Bailey on August 1, 1979 in St. Paul, MN. He was the answer to their prayers. After several miscarriages and many heartaches, Vance was the first and only baby that his mother was able to carry to term. Due to her heart shaped uterus as well as a couple other minor issues, nature would say that there was no way that Alex and Katherine would ever be biological parents. Good thing God had other plans.

Vance, Mom Bailey and Dad Bailey

Dad Bailey holding Vance before his christening. 

Vance with his Mumu and Pops.

Vance won a bulldog contest with those cheekers!

Throughout his life, Vance was raised to love sports (especially golf), interior design, photography, cooking, music, and computers (his father, after all, has a software business.) His grandfather, also known as Pawpaw, instilled his passion for golf into Vance from a very young age.

Vance and his cousin, Christopher, being hardcore.

Isn't he a cutie??

Why yes, that IS a shower cap on his head...

Sailor suit + golf club = EAT YOUR HEART OUT, LADIES!

Vance's family moved around a lot. Before he was born, his parents moved a lot due to his dad's army job. After Vance was born, they moved a lot due to his father's software company. They lived in places such as Alabama, Ohio, Texas, and most recently, North Carolina. During their extended stay in Ohio, they started foster care. While in OH, they adopted Vance's sister, Amanda. Not too long after they adopted Amanda, they moved to good ole NC.

Mom Bailey, Vance, and Amanda

Vance and Amanda

Dad Bailey, Mom Bailey, Vance, and Amanda

Later in life, Vance and his friends had a bit too much...fun. They made some poor decisions including drugs and alcohol. (Poor T, the cat, will never be the same due to the fact that he was in a room of boys smoking pot. The cat was stoned for a week straight. He's a VERY friendly cat these days, though.) Vance ended up getting his GED, moving to Gulf Shores, AL and enrolling in culinary school. The "partying" only escalated in culinary school. It's a little known fact that the culinary arts are a breeding ground for drug abuse. Emeril himself had a severe problem with drugs, even. Upon making the decision to change his life for the better, Vance moved back to NC to try to rid himself of his dangerous and abusive lifestyle. During this time, Vance's parents continued in foster care and adopted a sibling group of three kids, Kristina, Ricky, and Greg as well as two other children, Katie and Madison.

Vance's Graduation from Tarheel Military Academy

Vance at one of his birthday parties.

Vance at another of his birthday parties.

Vance on Christmas morning. He told me once he's pretty sure he was high here. 

Vance with Greg, Ricky, Amanda, Katie, and Kristina.

Vance with Amanda, Ricky, Katie, Kristina, Greg (what a goob) and Madison.

Vance with Kristina, Amanda, Ricky, Greg, Katie, and Madison.

Fast forward a few years and that's when Angela came into the picture. Vance and Angela originally met online, but their families (her uncle, aunt and cousins and his parents and youngest three siblings) knew each other through their church and the academy at their church. Neither Vance, nor Angela was looking for a relationship. Neither of them expected anything but a friendship. Neither of them were prepared for what God had in store. Angela remembers standing at the restaurant (Sushi Thai) and watching Vance walk up. She was seriously blown away. She was NOT expecting the gorgeous man walking toward her. (His profile picture was TERRIBLE.) Apparently, he was blown away as well, though she didn't quite know it at the time. They went inside to eat and conversation flowed like the River Jordan. (I'm assuming the Jordan River flows well...)

After eating dinner, Vance and Angela went to Starbucks (which they were both addicted to at the time) and spent the rest of the evening, til closing time, talking and laughing outside. She ended up freezing her butt off (it was early June and when the sun goes down, it gets chilly) so they went back to get her car and ended up talking for a couple more hours sitting in his car. At that time, they both had to pee like race horses. That's when Angela did something she has NEVER done before. She said he could go back to her apartment which was a few minutes away and use the bathroom. They ended up sitting on the couch...and falling asleep...til around 430 when she woke up and said,"OH MY GOODNESS!!!" (I do NOT recommend doing this. I should not have done this, but thankfully he wasn't an ax murderer or a rapist.) Anyway, their next date was him going with her to church. That afternoon, he asked her to be his girlfriend. A month later, she went with him and his family to Gulf Shores, AL and to his best friend's wedding. A couple of months later, he proposed. :-) 9.5 months later they were married. :-) (Yes, I realize that was all VERY fast, but when you know, you know! His parents were married within 2 months of knowing each other and have been married 38 years.)

Vance and I the first time he met my best friend!

Vance and I at his best friend's wedding.

Vance and I in Gulf Shores, AL.

Vance and I in Gulf Shores, AL after going on the bumper boats with his family.

Vance and I at a restaurant in Gulf Shores, AL. 

On June 19, 2010, Vance Bailey married Angela Theresa Kahl, the love of his life. He and his wife currently live in Winston-Salem, NC with their two dog children, Petey the Pug and Cinnamon the Doxie-Beagle. They attend church at Pinedale Christian Church. He works for his dad's software company, Polaris Systems, Inc. He enjoys playing golf with his best friend Erik, playing cards, and Alabama football. (Roll tide!) He is currently into photography, playing the ukulele, and photo editing (he keeps interrupting the writing of this post to show me different things he's done to some pictures he's taken! Ha!) Vance Bailey is having the time of his life with the love of his life!

Vance seeing Angela for the first time on their wedding day.

Vance and Angela during pictures before their wedding.

Vance and Angela on their 1 year wedding anniversary in the OBX!

Dearest Vance,
   I hope you enjoy the very short recounting of your life done by someone who has only known you for the last 2 years. Haha. I love you so much and I hope I did your life justice. Your life is truly a miracle, but not just because of the fertility issues your parents had. Your life is a miracle because of all you bring into the lives of others especially mine. You are an amazing husband. I could not ask for better. Happy 32nd, Turtle! I love you infinity and 'yond!

Love always,
Your Sweetpea

Happy Sweet 16, Hannah Girl!

This morning at 6 am, my baby sister turned 16 years old. My how time flies! Happy sweet 16, Hannah Girl! I love you infinity and 'yond!

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Isn't she just the cutest thing? Oh and those sexy legs in the background? Yeah...that is my 10 or 11 year old self. :-)

~A

Toy Story Themed Sweet 16?

Today my mom sent me an invitation to my youngest sister's sweet 16 party. She is having a fish fry with our family and a few of her friends. It's a no frills ordeal, to say the least. Mommy then Facebook messaged me (you wish your mom was that cool) asking if I was planning on making Hannah the umbrella skirt she so desperately wants and has begged asked me nicely for for the past month. Mommy then told me about how she's making Hannah a Jessie cake. It took me a minute to wrap my mind around that. Jessie, is the rootin tootin' cowgirl in Toy Story 2 that befriends Woody and learns that she, too, can be loved unconditionally by a child even though her first kid threw her away. Anyway, so my 16 year old sister...16, not 6, wants a Jessie cake for her birthday. Alright then. So...I thought to myself....what can we do to jazz it up a bit? How can we make a Jessie Sweet 16 Party?



Well...first of all...we're going to make some of these...

And I'm going to make her one of these...

And add some fried fish, mom's cake, some side dishes provided by various family members and you get a Sweet 16 Jessie Party! Stay tuned for pics of the actual party (which is March 19).

~A